How often are you angry with God, even though you claim you don't even believe in Him?
How much do you want to just yell at the top of your lungs at God, but only because you want to be a "good" person, you don't do it?
How often do you want to tell God you love Him?
Trust is solely dependent upon the reliability of the object of that trust. Can I trust a monkey to survive in the trees of the jungle if I put him there? Of course, because in that realm of life he is trustworthy. But can I trust in that same monkey to rescue to world from the current economic crisis we're facing? Yeah, I could try, but if I was serious in doing so and kept trying, I'd be wrapped up in a nice white jacket and thrown into a pretty room with padded, white walls.
What about God? Can I trust God at all times, which includes by implication in all places with all circumstances? Couple this with an exhortation to pour out my heart to him, a heart that often mistrusts, rebels, hates, spites, scorns, what do I see? I am confronted with the only reality that there is such sweet freedom in the God of my refuge! It's my heart that lead me to want to hide from God (Gen. 3:7-8), is deceitful beyond comprehension (Jer. 17:9), spewing forth all kinds of evils (Matt. 15:19-20). Yet I am challenged--commanded--to pour my heart out before him in all its brokenness, anger, hurt, and doubt. Who is this God I am called to trust? Will he not turn his back on me if I pour out this wretched heart before him?
I must conclude that I trust in God because he is not a monkey, though I know some want to caricature him in that light. Rather, he is the One who revealed just how trustworthy he is when he took on flesh and entered into this mess of a sinful world and loved his people. Who is more worthy of my or your trust than Christ who, knowing my heart even as I feebly attempt to hide (Jn. 2:24-25), loved me and gave himself up for me (Gal 2:20)? Jesus Christ is truly my refuge in times when I feel I can go anywhere or do anything and in times when I am absolutely lost and confused. What immense freedom there is knowing this dark heart can be pried open and laid bare before the Living God of all creation only to be treated with the utmost care and love by the blood of the Lamb, restored to its rightful purpose by his Holy Spirit.
Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge to us.
Today you might be hurting. You might be angry with God. You might feel dirty and unable to look to God. Your heart might not be able to trust him. But I ask that you fix your eyes at what Jesus accomplished in the past on the Cross and by his resurrection to change your life in the present so that you may be with him forever in the future. He wants you to pour your heart out before him--no matter what condition it is in--turning from it all, trusting in him, and seeking refuge in his freeing love.
By His Grace.